Friday, November 05, 2004

Fellow Republicans Check Out What Michael Moore is Saying

Dear Friends,
Ok, it sucks. Really sucks. But before you go and cash it all in, let's, inthe words of Monty Python, 'always look on the bright side of life!' ThereIS some good news from Tuesday's election.
Here are 17 reasons not to slit your wrists:

1. It is against the law for George W. Bush to run for president again.

It's also against the law for Bill Clinton to run again :)

6. Michigan voted for Kerry! So did the entire Northeast, the birthplace ofour democracy. So did 6 of the 8 Great Lakes States. And the whole WestCoast! Plus Hawaii. Ok, that's a start. We've got most of the fresh water,all of Broadway, and Mt. St. Helens. We can dehydrate them or bury them inlava. And no more show tunes!

Nice Mike... augh...

9. Gays, thanks to the ballot measures passed on Tuesday, cannot get married in 11 new states. Thank God. Just think of all those wedding gifts we won't have to buy now.

Hey Gay friends, I think Mike has issues with you getting married. That must hurt!

12. Admit it: We like the Bush twins and we don't want them to go away.

14. Bush is now a lame duck president. He will have no greater moment than the one he's having this week. It's all downhill for him from here on out --and, more significantly, he's just not going to want to do all the hard workthat will be expected of him. It'll be like everyone's last month in 12th grade -- you've already made it, so it's party time! Perhaps he'll treat the next four years like a permanent Friday, spending even more time at the ranch or in Kennebunkport. And why shouldn't he? He's already proved his point, avenged his father and kicked our ass.

Chill Mike...hurts to lose huh?

15. Should Bush decide to show up to work and take this country down a verydark road, it is also just as likely that either of the following twoscenarios will happen: a) Now that he doesn't ever need to pander to theChristian conservatives again to get elected, someone may whisper in his earthat he should spend these last four years building "a legacy" so thathistory will render a kinder verdict on him and thus he will not push fortoo aggressive a right-wing agenda; or b) He will become so cocky andarrogant -- and thus, reckless -- that he will commit a blunder of suchmajor proportions that even his own party will have to remove him fromoffice.

Here I think Mike is getting President Bush confused with Bill Clinton.

16. There are nearly 300 million Americans -- 200 million of them of voting age. We only lost by three and a half million! That's not a landslide -- it means we're almost there. Imagine losing by 20 million. If you had 58 yards to go before you reached the goal line and then you barreled down 55 of those yards, would you stop on the three yard line, pick up the ball and gohome crying -- especially when you get to start the next down on the threeyard line? Of course not! Buck up! Have hope! More sports analogies arecoming!!!

Mike, playing sports - now there's an idea for Mike. :) And the win was HUGE, even the liberal media is saying that!

If you want to see the whole list visit Mike's website.

Michael Moore


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